Written by Dirty Di. Dirty Di is the author of Astray and Deborah and Aviva.
A note from the author: This is the third part of “Teshuva, Tefila, Tzedaka.” Make sure you start with Part One and Part Two!
“Teshuva, Tefila, Tzedaka” is the third part of a series called Holiday Indulgence. The series follows the adventures and misadventures of our heroine Malka Berkovich throughout the Jewish calendar, a fictional character that simply can’t resist celebrating and cherishing her Judaism.
Each installment can be read as a separate piece, although because of the character and the story’s development, I wouldn’t advise it. The first part, Shavuot, can be found here.
DAY 7 — Tzedaka
“Why are we in West Harlem, dear?”
“Because you, my girl, are going to do tzedaka, an act of kindness.”
“I do acts of kindness enough, Hannah. And I don’t have to take the subway to do them, thank you, very much.”
“Really?”
“Yes! I make a lot of donations!”
“Malka, I’m an accountant. You don’t have to point how these ‘altruistic’ donations help your taxes.”
“I fail to see how that annuls the good deed.”
“It doesn’t. But you need to take a step further! Especially during the Yamim Noraim! Remember, you are being judged.”
“Something says I’m going to regret this.”
“How can you ever regret doing good for mankind?”
“Have you heard that no good deed goes unpunished? Actually, why don’t we get out of here and I take you to Broadway so you can watch the musical version of that statement!”
“Malka!”
“Hannah, this place is unsafe.”
“Okay, so let’s wrap it up really fast. Look, just pick somebody.”
“Whatever for?”
“To offer a job to that person.”
“Offer a job. Doing what exactly? I highly doubt these people have any kind of qualification.”
“Then find something. Do they need qualification to wash the dishes? Or make your coffee? Or clean the bathrooms? Anything would help them.”
“Why?”
“Because it’s not about giving money away just to fill a charity quota, Malka, it’s about actually helping somebody get on their feet. Look around you, these people need an opportunity.”
Malka took a deep breath and walked towards a woman on the ground with two kids sitting beside her. Reluctantly, she kneeled before her and handed her a card.
“Hi… I may be able to help you get a job. Go to this address tomorrow and ask for Bradley, he’ll be waiting for you.” After asking for the woman’s name and telling her there was day-care available for the kids, she stood up and walked back to Hannah and her 100-watt smile.
“There. Are you happy?”
“I am. Aren’t you?”
“Would you believe me if I said I’m not?”
“Not a chance. And look, you weren’t struck by a lightning bolt!”
“I have to call Bradley when we get back.”
Celebrating 10 Years & Marking the End of An Amazing Project
Celebrating 10 Years & Marking the End of An Amazing Project
What an incredible night Jewrotica was!!!! There was this fantastic moment, in a sea of Jews of all sexualities, ages, backgrounds and denominations, that I realized we were all in this together! I hope that there are many more events coming to Austin soon!
I’m into Jewrotica. I went in for my second circumcision.
Learning about sex and what’s right and wrong when it comes to sex from a Biblical standpoint was an eye opening experience. I completely enjoyed it and think something like this could be a very cool thing to bring to even high school aged Jewish youth groups.
You may not tell your mom that you’re going to a live Jewrotica reading (or whatever clever name you will dub these events) but you will tell your friends. However, both would be jealous if they find out that they missed it. I think it will only be a matter of time before Jewrotica helps us reclaim the term “Dirty Jew” the way rap music has done for “The ‘N’ Word.” I know I am now proud to be a Dirty Jew!
Jewrotica is something that the community has needed for a long time so that people can actually learn, express and share and have good relationships without having to stumble through life. Check out the site and learn something. Have fun!
I’m so glad that Jewrotica is represented here at Jewlicious! It’s bringing voices that need to be heard in the Jewish discussion and Jewish climate environment.
Such an amazing experience! The Sarah Lawrence Jewrotica workshop was more than I could have ever expected – a comfortable, safe, sultry environment where participants clearly felt good about sharing or listening to each other’s intimate experiences and relating them to sexy stories from the Torah. From the moment the workshop began, Ayo had a sweet presence that was kinetic and spread around the room; her storytelling abilities had everyone enraptured and made the conversation topics relata… Read more
I’m Heshy Fried from Frum Satire and I am very, very frum. And I completely support Jewrotica – it’s doing a service to the frum community. We need some sort of kosher sexual education. Jewrotica even has a system that allows frum filters to filter out certain things to make it PG for us. It’s mamish Torah. It’s like The Little Midrash Says for sex.
Jewrotica rocks. It’s funny, it’s informative, it’s sexy, it’s interesting. Check it out!
Bedside Reading with Jewrotica was funny, sexy, and hot all at once. The readings were honest about all kinds of sexuality, but the highlight of the evening was definitely the confessions, written by audience participants. Nobody knew who wrote them, and most were tell-alls that would make your bubbe blush. Unless your bubbe was very, very cool. Then maybe she’d make YOU blush!
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