Written by Karalyn Dane. Karalyn, the newest member of the Jewrotica team, is the author of Sweet Dreams.
1. The person carving the turkey is Lord of the table. Though shalt not discuss your new-found vegetarianism as the turkey is being carved, or at least not while he’s holding the knife.
2. You must have no other sexual orientation other than the one everybody already knows about. Trust me, this is not a good time to make any announcements unless you know it will lead to a mazal tov (see commandment #1 re: knife).
3. Do not drink too much, lest yourshikker (drunken) state cause you to reveal too much about your personal life. It is likely you will pay for these slip-ups for a few decades, if not generations.
4. Thou shall be gracious and kind to everyone at the table and not make any sexual innuendos about breasts, thighs, mounds of mashed potatoes, stuffing or gravy.
5. DO NOT bite the hand that feeds you no matter how much you want to.
6. Thou shalt not present any new body piercings or tattoos at the thanksgiving table.
7. Honor you father and mother so that they will continue to help pay for things. Kvetch (complain) too much and they might stop.
8. Do not do anything inappropriate at the table, on the table or under the table, at least until the table has been cleared and everyone has gone to sleep.
9. Do not covet thy sister’s boyfriend, thy brother’s girlfriend, thy cousin, aunt, uncle, niece or nephew, because it is likely you will never live it down nor be allowed to ever forget it and it will likely be the topic of conversation at every future thanksgiving meal so long as you both shall live.
10. Remember that this is your family and no matter how crazy they drive you, you will be going home soon.
Celebrating 10 Years & Marking the End of An Amazing Project
Celebrating 10 Years & Marking the End of An Amazing Project
Bedside Reading with Jewrotica was funny, sexy, and hot all at once. The readings were honest about all kinds of sexuality, but the highlight of the evening was definitely the confessions, written by audience participants. Nobody knew who wrote them, and most were tell-alls that would make your bubbe blush. Unless your bubbe was very, very cool. Then maybe she’d make YOU blush!
Jewrotica rocks. It’s funny, it’s informative, it’s sexy, it’s interesting. Check it out!
I’m so glad that Jewrotica is represented here at Jewlicious! It’s bringing voices that need to be heard in the Jewish discussion and Jewish climate environment.
The people behind Jewrotica are quite quality! I have confidence that any project these folks take on will be equally quality.
Jewrotica is awesome. It expands the mind and for people who were raised with narrow views on sexuality. Whether you are Jewish or not, or in different sects of Judaism like Orthodox, Conservative or Reform, no matter what your background or where you’re from, Jewrotica gets you to see Judaism and how it relates to sexuality in new ways. I really appreciate Ayo being here and helping us learn different ways to connect with our sexuality.
While many people fear the “sex talk,” Jewrotica offers an opportunity for writers and audiences to speak about sexuality in a open and safe space. When I attended a Jewrotica reading, I heard stories that reminded me that love takes many forms, and that expressing it is a vital part of who we are as a people.
I attended and participated in last month’s Jewrotica event. The engaging performers and Ayo, our inviting host, inspired the audience to feel like one big community. What a great way to inspire our community to embrace sex as a beautiful thing that can be fun, exciting, sacred, sensual, ridiculous, scary and everything in between!
Jewrotica is something that the community has needed for a long time so that people can actually learn, express and share and have good relationships without having to stumble through life. Check out the site and learn something. Have fun!
I’m Heshy Fried from Frum Satire and I am very, very frum. And I completely support Jewrotica – it’s doing a service to the frum community. We need some sort of kosher sexual education. Jewrotica even has a system that allows frum filters to filter out certain things to make it PG for us. It’s mamish Torah. It’s like The Little Midrash Says for sex.
You may not tell your mom that you’re going to a live Jewrotica reading (or whatever clever name you will dub these events) but you will tell your friends. However, both would be jealous if they find out that they missed it. I think it will only be a matter of time before Jewrotica helps us reclaim the term “Dirty Jew” the way rap music has done for “The ‘N’ Word.” I know I am now proud to be a Dirty Jew!
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