Written by Shoshana Martyniak. Shosh, a first-time Jewrotica writer, spends her days rewriting and editing the words of her American shtetl. Apparently, she’s got some other ideas in her head…
Every morning no matter the length of the lines in the cage-like tunnels at the Qalandia checkpoint between Ramallah and Jerusalem, while other Palestinians minimize the possessions in the hope they will move through the line faster, I’m stuffing my pockets. It’s pure idiocy, I realize. I’m that guy that holds people up. Of course, it’s worse than that. I’m that guy that grew up two floors down from you in a crowded apartment whose mother sits in your mother’s apartment each Tuesday to share Turkish coffee, gossip, and a hope that grumbly husbands might stay out just a little longer. You know me. You know I’m smart. You know I’m destined for life beyond these walls. And yet, every day, I can’t seem to empty my pockets fast enough.
The truth is, none of them actually know me. Yes, I have a life beyond these walls. Yes, I still live with my family in Ramallah. But if they knew me, they’d know my papers are sometimes at the bottom of my bag and my pockets are filled with too many coins, too many sets of keys, in the hopes that he’ll bark orders in American English from behind the glass.
“Faster.”
His hair is shaved; his eyes hidden behind dark aviator sunglasses, his face stuck in a constant state of annoyance, which I attribute to the crappy job and not a weakness in his personality. Once in a great while, he won’t be wearing his glasses, and all I can see are pale blue eyes against olive skin. Skin like mine. Eyes like the Mediterranean: blue with flecks of white salt. I drink in his eyes from behind my cage, from behind the line. I audibly sigh. The hijab-covered head in front of me twists to shoot me a look. I know she can’t hear my thoughts, but I can’t help but worry.
Every week is the same. My life is the same. My university studies are the same. The lines inside the check-point cage are the same. Then one day, he’s gone. No more eyes. No more English. He’s replaced by some quiet guy with curls and a beard who never yells in English and hardly ever looks up. Soon, my pockets get lighter and my papers magically appear in my hands.
“Look,” Madaam al-Kanani from apartment 24 says with a smirk, “Basir is learning to organize himself.”
She pauses, smirks again, and says to the crowd of oh-too-familiar faces, “Or maybe, khawaaja, prays he doesn’t need papers.”
Celebrating 10 Years & Marking the End of An Amazing Project
Celebrating 10 Years & Marking the End of An Amazing Project
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I love the inclusiveness – there is something for everyone, in and out of the Jewish community.
You may not tell your mom that you’re going to a live Jewrotica reading (or whatever clever name you will dub these events) but you will tell your friends. However, both would be jealous if they find out that they missed it. I think it will only be a matter of time before Jewrotica helps us reclaim the term “Dirty Jew” the way rap music has done for “The ‘N’ Word.” I know I am now proud to be a Dirty Jew!
My opinion on Jewrotica is: It’s sexy. It’s awesome. It’s Judaism to the next level. It’s what we should all be getting into!
Bedside Reading with Jewrotica was funny, sexy, and hot all at once. The readings were honest about all kinds of sexuality, but the highlight of the evening was definitely the confessions, written by audience participants. Nobody knew who wrote them, and most were tell-alls that would make your bubbe blush. Unless your bubbe was very, very cool. Then maybe she’d make YOU blush!
Jewrotica is awesome. It expands the mind and for people who were raised with narrow views on sexuality. Whether you are Jewish or not, or in different sects of Judaism like Orthodox, Conservative or Reform, no matter what your background or where you’re from, Jewrotica gets you to see Judaism and how it relates to sexuality in new ways. I really appreciate Ayo being here and helping us learn different ways to connect with our sexuality.
I had a great time deejaying at the Jewrotica event at Columbia University. The live readings were hilarious, informative, and in some cases, deeply moving. I know that I, along with many of my AEPi fraternity brothers, loved being able to connect our Judaism and our sexuality in a way that made all of us feel comfortable and welcome. I look forward to being a part of this again in the future!
I attended and participated in last month’s Jewrotica event. The engaging performers and Ayo, our inviting host, inspired the audience to feel like one big community. What a great way to inspire our community to embrace sex as a beautiful thing that can be fun, exciting, sacred, sensual, ridiculous, scary and everything in between!
Jewrotica is a great way to ask interesting questions about the interplay between sensuality and Jewish wisdom. Check it out.
I’m Heshy Fried from Frum Satire and I am very, very frum. And I completely support Jewrotica – it’s doing a service to the frum community. We need some sort of kosher sexual education. Jewrotica even has a system that allows frum filters to filter out certain things to make it PG for us. It’s mamish Torah. It’s like The Little Midrash Says for sex.
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