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Fantasizing in the Gush

By on October 26, 2012
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Fantasizing in the Gush1

Written by Ophira.  Ophira is a first-time Jewrotica writer.  [Editor’s Note: Be advised that this piece contains references to fantasy and sexual assault that may be triggering for some readers.  And don’t forget to check the handy Jewrotica Glossary for any unfamiliar terms.]

PG-13Growing up in Efrat, I had a healthy level of interaction with both men and women.  For those of you unfamiliar with Efrat, we are a vibrant Orthodox and Zionist community 8,000 strong located just outside of Jerusalem.  Most of Efrat’s residents are ideologically motivated to live here and Judaism guides our daily life and practice, though we are not Haredi.  We identify as Dati Li’Umi – this literally means “national religious” and can be compared to Modern Orthodox in America, but our community is really a different ballpark altogether.

I attended a girls-only ulpana during high school, though I would see the guys in the community on Shabbat afternoon at B’nai Akiva – our youth group – and that was fine by me.  Social interaction between the guys and girls was permitted and even encouraged on Shabbat, but remained innocent enough.  There was no making out with boys, no hand holding, nothing like that – and my friends and I internalized a lot of the values that came from living in this “wholesome” and at times sheltered world.

There was little romance in my life as a teenager, but I had role models for what a healthy relationship looked like: two loving parents who sometimes seemed too mushy as they would kiss all the time… in front of me and my siblings.

My parent’s interactions normalized the idea of romantic affection between spouses, but nobody had initiated any real discussions with me about sexuality and its place in a relationship.  I didn’t have any outlets to understand or embrace sexuality, and certainly didn’t receive any real sexual education in high school.

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  • Please give us an option to read a post as a single page.

    • I should also add that we added this “next page” option because people were complaining that some posts were too long and they couldn’t keep track of how much they had read… so, you know. Be kind. We’re working on it.

    • The option exists! Thanks for the feedback and – now that that’s taken care of – tell us your thoughts on the piece. That would be so much more fun of a comment to read. 🙂

  • Good point Warren. I’ll try to find an appropriate plugin… unless you know of one. This pagination thing is kind of a hidden default short code on WordPress.

    But otherwise, how did you like the post?

  • Ophira, thank you for being brave enough to share your story and journey. I imagine that many of our readers will find your message relevant and valuable.

  • Anonymous, for now

    For a post labeled PG-13, this was an incredibly hot read. Perhaps it’s because I’ve always been on the male side of the story. I deeply related to this line:
    Growing up, I was always a “good girl” and had no desire to be
    promiscuous. I felt little connection to the sex oozing from western
    cultural influences like MTV. Outright sexual imagery didn’t interest
    me because I couldn’t relate.

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