Author’s Note: Sex is never only a physical act. It’s always done in psychological, sociological and cultural contexts. A man may nurture a young lover in a relationship that’s beneficial to both. In Ancient Greece, it was a socially acceptable custom for an older man to take a young male lover, and help him develop sexually and emotionally till he matured enough for typical heterosexual relationships. In contrast, a modern pimp nurtures a young woman, only for exploitative purposes, which leads rapidly to her humiliation and degradation. However in certain circumstances the roles are reversed with the sexes, for example, take these lockthecock stories.
Humiliation and degradation, along with extensive permanent psychological damage, are also the results of abuse of young people by clerics and teachers who use their positions for personal sexual gratification. While most clerics and teachers perform their duties quietly and honorably, news reports too often describe others who don’t.
Friday at 4:00
Why Friday? Why meet at all? I had only asked for an ordinary recommendation to university. I stared at the note for a long time. Friday at 4:00, when everyone else would be racing home for Shabbat, we would be alone in his office.
The weight of images fell on me till I could barely breath: his eyes locking on certain girls a bit too long when he asked them a question in Contemporary Jewish Morals; how they played along the skin revealed at their neck and wrists by the black uniforms when he thought no one would notice during exams or rested on the small buds in my bulky school sweater hinting at my tiny breasts. Rav Yosef wanted me; he meant to take me this Friday.
Each year he picked a different girl just after she had turned 18, someone with problems: a divorce, rare in our community; money problems, very common, or simply a girl like me who didn’t quite fit tightly into the “get an education so I could support a budding scholar and his eight children” mold. I had never said I wouldn’t. The social sanctions would have been too high, but I had applied for studies which were less than practical to Ivy League Universities. That was enough to generate critical looks and whispered comments by the girls who were mostly married, or at least engaged, by the time they were high school seniors. But university would be my ticket out, not out of Judaism, but out of this neighborhood that was suffocating me.
There were other things about me that were different. Things they didn’t know: the “illegal” iPad I had bought secretly a few years ago while visiting family in Tel Aviv so I could surf “non-kosher” websites, that I couldn’t get computer or STD viruses from an iSO operating system and that I had a clit that gave hours of pleasure while I tugged my pussy lips and twisted my nipples like the girls on the net.
I learned a new vocabulary: handjob, footjob, blowjob, facial, 69 and rusty trombone that I dream of trying one day with a husband; MILF, FemDom and BBW – that doesn’t interest me so much; bisexual, tranny, gay and LGBT – though I respect everyone, it didn’t seem like me; gangbang, facebang, orgy, and 3som -, how could anyone possibly keep track of what belongs to who; and fisting, BDSM Dp, Dp anal – just a one word description,: “ouch.” They were endless, as were my “practice sessions,” and my attempts to figure out how any of these might be part of me, the me that didn’t quite fit in.
…and sometimes, I thought about Rav Yosef instead of the eager multi colored men I watched stuffing huge cocks into helpless screaming young girls. I thought of his long blond beard teasing my pussy lips, his wavy side-locks wrapped around my tiny teen fingers and sometimes when my left hand was busy stuffing fingers into my tiny pussy and tight asshole, I took my right hand away from my clit long enough to snap cloth pins over my tiny pink nipples. The delicious pain. The orgasms lasted forever, and the pain in my bruised nipples for about a week. I giggled at the images: so lovely; so naughty.
The giggling quieted; gradually replaced by an uneasy feeling that quickly turned to nausea as I remembered how the other girls who Rav Yosef had “chosen” seemed to have changed during the year. How their light had dimmed; by graduation it seemed as if they were walking in the dark. I had a lot to figure out by Friday.
Celebrating 10 Years & Marking the End of An Amazing Project
Celebrating 10 Years & Marking the End of An Amazing Project
I stepped out of my comfort zone to be a part of this. I was glad to open up the topic of sexuality in my community. We are trying to build a safe space to talk about sex. The result I am most happy about coming from this event is that hopefully now my friends know they can come and talk to me, that I can be their ‘safe space’.
Bedside Reading with Jewrotica was funny, sexy, and hot all at once. The readings were honest about all kinds of sexuality, but the highlight of the evening was definitely the confessions, written by audience participants. Nobody knew who wrote them, and most were tell-alls that would make your bubbe blush. Unless your bubbe was very, very cool. Then maybe she’d make YOU blush!
Such an amazing experience! The Sarah Lawrence Jewrotica workshop was more than I could have ever expected – a comfortable, safe, sultry environment where participants clearly felt good about sharing or listening to each other’s intimate experiences and relating them to sexy stories from the Torah. From the moment the workshop began, Ayo had a sweet presence that was kinetic and spread around the room; her storytelling abilities had everyone enraptured and made the conversation topics relata… Read more
While many people fear the “sex talk,” Jewrotica offers an opportunity for writers and audiences to speak about sexuality in a open and safe space. When I attended a Jewrotica reading, I heard stories that reminded me that love takes many forms, and that expressing it is a vital part of who we are as a people.
What an incredible night Jewrotica was!!!! There was this fantastic moment, in a sea of Jews of all sexualities, ages, backgrounds and denominations, that I realized we were all in this together! I hope that there are many more events coming to Austin soon!
I attended and participated in last month’s Jewrotica event. The engaging performers and Ayo, our inviting host, inspired the audience to feel like one big community. What a great way to inspire our community to embrace sex as a beautiful thing that can be fun, exciting, sacred, sensual, ridiculous, scary and everything in between!
I had a great time deejaying at the Jewrotica event at Columbia University. The live readings were hilarious, informative, and in some cases, deeply moving. I know that I, along with many of my AEPi fraternity brothers, loved being able to connect our Judaism and our sexuality in a way that made all of us feel comfortable and welcome. I look forward to being a part of this again in the future!
Learning about sex and what’s right and wrong when it comes to sex from a Biblical standpoint was an eye opening experience. I completely enjoyed it and think something like this could be a very cool thing to bring to even high school aged Jewish youth groups.
Jewrotica is awesome. It expands the mind and for people who were raised with narrow views on sexuality. Whether you are Jewish or not, or in different sects of Judaism like Orthodox, Conservative or Reform, no matter what your background or where you’re from, Jewrotica gets you to see Judaism and how it relates to sexuality in new ways. I really appreciate Ayo being here and helping us learn different ways to connect with our sexuality.
You may not tell your mom that you’re going to a live Jewrotica reading (or whatever clever name you will dub these events) but you will tell your friends. However, both would be jealous if they find out that they missed it. I think it will only be a matter of time before Jewrotica helps us reclaim the term “Dirty Jew” the way rap music has done for “The ‘N’ Word.” I know I am now proud to be a Dirty Jew!
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